Legacy (RiffRaff Records Book 2) Page 7

  “I’m sorry, Sweets.”

  He climbed out my window, leaving me a sobbing mess in my bed, and disappeared from my life.

  ***

  “Halen?”

  I looked up at the sound of my mother’s concerned voice. The whole family was staring at me. Cash leaned in and whispered, “Hales, you’re crying.” He pressed a napkin into my hand.

  I wiped at my tears, tears I hadn’t even realized were running down my face. “Uh, sorry. I, uh, we didn’t really know him or anything, but it’s still sad, you know? Jared.” Yet another flashback. Fudge. Everything I’d locked away kept fighting its way to the surface. I didn’t know if I’d be able to survive another one today. Each memory was like a knife to my heart, shredding any semblance of strength I had.

  My mother’s face morphed into one of understanding and sympathy. “I know, baby girl. It is sad.”

  I wiped at my eyes one more time then I took a deep breath, and talking quietly to Cash, said, “I didn’t even realize…”

  “I know. It’s okay. You’re good. That was a nice save.”

  I nodded but kept my head down. I could feel Beau’s gaze on me. I hadn’t fooled him.

  He knew my tears had nothing to do with Jared and everything to do with him.

  ***

  Cash pulled me aside ten minutes later after dinner was over. “Four days, Hales. You gonna make it?”

  “Don’t really have a choice, do I?” And Uncle Smith’s “united family” speech pretty much guaranteed that I wouldn’t be able to run away even if things got too hard. Four days. I just had to hang in there for four days. I stood up to carry my plate to the trash, finishing the glass of wine in my hand.

  “Here. Have another.” Cash poured me a fresh round.

  “I don’t think drunk is what I need to be tonight.” That was just what we all needed to happen. Me getting wasted and weepy. Not to mention mouthy.

  “Well, we don’t need you downing a bottle of cough syrup to fall asleep either.” He raised an eyebrow, daring me to tell him he was wrong.

  “Stop digging through my trash, weirdo.” I took a long sip of my drink, grateful for the cool liquid that was helping to calm my frayed nerves.

  “Stop self-medicating to make it through the night.” Cash was protective by nature, more so after Beau took off. Scaring away my lame-ass excuses for dates was about the only annoying younger cousin thing he did. Everything else was to keep me safe, keep me level.

  After Beau had left, Cash had snuck into my window for months, sleeping on the floor in my room, watching TV with me until I’d cry myself to sleep. “I thought we were done with the knocked-out-cold night caps.”

  “I was.” My eyes wandered to my younger sister. She was laughing at something Crue had just whispered in her ear. “I am, I mean.” Last night after everyone had gone I’d felt fragile, almost raw.

  “They make you remember, don’t they?” He followed my gaze, seeing the same thing I did. Two teenagers in lust. Or love. Or whatever it was they had going on. I covered for them, but I tried to stay out of it as much as I could. It still hurt too much.

  “Sometimes.” I turned my back on them and took another deep drink of my Prosecco. The only alcohol my mom would let me openly consume at family dinners. She said it was basically like carbonated water.

  “You ready to head out? I’ll walk you home.” Cash let out a sigh and looked around the yard. The rest of our family were all talking, all gathered around Beau and Landry. The two oldest had returned home and were holding court. At least no one was paying much attention to—

  “Halen, get over here and spend some time with your cousin. I know you’ve been missing him like crazy.” My mom held her arm out for me to join her. Ugh. I turned my back to her, drained my third glass of Prosecco and then let her pull me to her side. She gave me a squeeze. “I have an idea, why don’t you older kids head down to the tank? Take some wine, some beer. Go catch up. We’ll keep Marley and Emmie here with us.”

  Avory perked up. “Yeah that sounds like a good idea, right Hales?” I glared in her direction. Brat just wanted to finagle some alone time with Crue. I couldn’t blame her. I’d have done the same thing when I was sixteen. And it wasn’t her fault that Cash and Crue had shielded her from the worst of what happened between Beau and me. All she knew was that we dated, and we’d had a really bad breakup.

  It was Landry who took pity on me. “I’m down, but I’m sure Beau is super beat. I mean, he rode eight hours on a motorcycle today.”

  “Nonsense.” Aunt B chuckled. Well. At least Landry had tried. “Beau hasn’t seen his cousins in two years. He can sleep in tomorrow.” Aunt B put her arms around her kids, clutching them to her. “You guys go have fun. We won’t wait up.” Beau took a deep breath and held it. He met my gaze and sent me an apologetic smile. He didn’t want to be spending time with me, just like I didn’t want to be spending time with him. He’d moved on. He lived a life full of adventure, full of crazy stories that made amazing pictures. A life that he never would have had if he’d stayed here with me. If we’d been parents.

  Cash shook his head and grabbed a fresh bottle of wine from the ice bucket on the porch, then he took my hand and pulled me toward the front yard. He watched over his shoulder as Marley and Jett took off in the opposite direction. “Where do you think they’re going? Are we sure they don’t have a Crue-Avory thing going on?”

  Jett and Marely disappeared into the darkness. “I keep asking and they keep telling me no.” They were inseparable most of the time; there was never any sexual tension there, but they were definitely hiding something.

  Landry took the bottle from Cash, popping it open as she climbed into the back seat of Uncle Luke’s tricked-out Razor. “When did those two become so hot and heavy?” She gestured toward Crue and Avory as his hand snaked its way up her skirt.

  “It’s a rather new development. Last couple months or so.” Cash sat beside Landry, holding his hand out for me to sit next to him. “They are less than covert op, if you get what I’m saying.” Crue got behind the wheel and fired it up. Avory was sitting between him and Beau. She squealed when Crue peeled out.

  Chapter Eight

  Beau

  This was hard. Heart breaking. But I knew it was harder on Halen. I could feel the tension coming off her body from my spot six feet away. Crue and Avory had disappeared into the field, the tall grass and dark shadows hiding whatever it was they were doing. Those two were going to end up with chiggers if they weren’t careful. Landry, Cash, Hales, and I were all gathered around the fire I’d made on the bank of the small manmade lake that our parents used to keep stocked with fish when we were younger. I watched as my sister and my first—my only—love passed around a bottle of Prosecco. I kept quiet, not wanting to disturb their good time. I wanted Halen to loosen up. I wanted to hear her laugh again. I wanted proof that I’d done the right thing in leaving her.

  Yeah, guilt made me a selfish bastard.

  After a while, Crue and Avory came and sat with us, and her shirt was on backward. “So nice of you two to join the family.” Landry put her hands on her hips, playing the big sister.

  Crue grabbed two beers from the cooler, popping the caps and handing one to Avory. She smiled at him like he hung the moon, and my chest began to ache. Once upon a time I had a beautiful girl who looked at me like that. “Beau. Man. Tell us about life, tell us about your latest adventure.”

  I didn’t look at Halen. I was chicken shit. Too afraid to see the hurt and fear in her eyes hearing about my new life. I knew she thought I was living it up, doing everything I’d ever dreamed. But she was dead wrong, because I’d only had one dream since I was a kid. Growing old with her. “I’ve been in New Orleans, hitting up some pretty sketch bars and nightclubs outside the Quarter.”

  “You going to do another show at that gallery in Austin?” Avory huddled into Crue’s side and he put his arm around her.

  “Uh, yeah. Aunt Lex set up another show, it’s actually
next weekend, I think.” I took a sip of my beer. I was never around for any of my showings so I didn’t keep too close track of when they opened. “I’m getting some great stuff in New Orleans right now. I think I can fill the gallery with just that trip.” There were some sad souls in that city. They didn’t keep the darkness at bay as well as some of the other places I’d visited. It suited me well. I didn’t do light and happy, not anymore.

  Crue turned his attention to my older sister. “What about you, Landry? You still dating that hotshot surgeon of yours?”

  She laughed. “Uh, no.” She grabbed the wine bottle from Halen and took a big sip. “Turns out I couldn’t really handle that hotshot ego of his.” She blew it off like it was no big deal. But from what I could recall of our past conversations, she’d been pretty into him. Almost idolized him in the beginning; he had been her mentor.

  “And? Anyone else? Anyone new?” Crue picked Avory up and sat her in his lap, letting her snuggle down and get more comfortable. She looked like she was seconds away from passing out.

  “Uh, um, well, there’s, uh, someone. It’s new and I’m not ready to talk about it yet. So.” Landry shrugged, looking down at the ground, avoiding eye contact with all of us. She hadn’t mentioned any of this to me, and I talked to her a few times a week. I glanced over at Halen, gauging her reaction to the news. She seemed just as surprised as the rest of the group. Those two were close, and it was odd for Landry to not confide in either of us.

  Cash scoffed. “Even with us? We tell each other everything. The good, the bad, and the ugly, right?” I could feel his gaze on me as he spoke. He was pissed that I was home, that I was here hurting Halen. But right now, the only one upsetting her was him. He didn’t need to allude to our secrets, our pain.

  Luckily Landry started talking again. “Yeah. You know, uh, you guys will be the first to know. It’s just, well, new.” I’d never heard my sister stutter like she was right now. Either she was really into this new guy or she was nervous about the prospect of us finding out about him. Or maybe both. She took a deep breath, turning things around on her baby cousin. “What about you, C Money? Anyone special? Any girls?”

  He shook his head. “Nah. I, uh—”

  Avory interrupted him, giggling. “Cash gets enough play for two guys, isn’t that right?” Crue put his hand gently over her mouth, shaking his head. The look on Cash’s face was one of pure annoyance.

  Landry laughed, probably relieved that the spotlight was off her love life and onto someone else’s. “Whoa. What does that mean? Cash, you holding out on us?”

  He hung his head. “No. It’s Avory. She’s drunk.”

  “Yeah. I think my girl had one too many tonight.” Crue pulled her tighter against him, whispering in her ear, so softly no one else could hear.

  The rest of us got a little quiet after that. Avory closed her eyes, like she was ready for a nap. I wanted to ask about Halen. I wanted to know if she was dating anyone. Being intimate with anyone. But it wasn’t any of my business. Her love life was no longer my concern. I’d lost that right the day I left. I didn’t know what would be worse. Her lying in her bedroom all weekend alone or her going out and living it up with the UT football team.

  I knew it was hard on her after I took off. I’d never asked, but my mother would tell me about my cousins when she called, always more than ready to catch me up on the family. The adults thought Halen was just depressed for a little while with people leaving. First Landry, and then me. We were the two she was closest with, so the ‘rents thought that was what had been tough for her.

  But I knew different.

  Cash had called me once, about three months after I’d left. He said he couldn’t reach her, couldn’t bring her out of it, that she was still spiraling. He said that she started to put on a good face for the parents, but when she’d leave the house claiming to go to a party she’d end up curled in a ball in the tree house. I told him to tear the fucking thing down. He hadn’t.

  Once I was sure Avory was asleep, I looked over at Crue, breaking the somewhat strained silence. “What about you two? What’s going on with you and Avory? Is this just a fling?”

  He shook his head, watching her sleep with a smile on his lips and affection in his eyes. “No, not even close, man. I love her.”

  “Has it left the compound?” Of course he loved her. It was evident in their every touch, their every interaction. If the parents didn’t notice, they were blind. Had Halen and I been that way? So obvious?

  “No. Just you guys, just the cousins know. Jett and Marley too now. We’re careful at school. No one thinks we’re dating. We don’t want it getting back to the parents, not yet.” He glanced quickly at Halen, and then met my eyes. “I get it now, I get what you and Halen had, why you… I just don’t know what their reaction is going to be. I’m afraid they’ll try to keep us apart, and I couldn’t handle that.” I sent him a sad smile. I knew what he was going through, the turmoil and the guilt, the intense desire and love. I’d been there. I’d experienced it all. I had been terrified all the time that Uncle Dash would find out about Halen and me, and he’d make me leave. Keep us apart. But no, I’d done that all on my own.

  I didn’t know what to say. I had no advice to give, no words of wisdom. And talking about it, what they were feeling, what they were going through? It would only hurt Halen. She was already sitting across from me, utterly silent. She hadn’t spoken a word in the past thirty minutes. Her eyes stayed on the fire, studying the flames like they held the answers to the universe. I let out a small chuckle, determined to change the subject. “Bringing in the young ones, huh? Jett and Marley get to be in the inner circle now?”

  “Yeah, well Jett’s sixteen, playing JV ball. He’s around all the time, at the same parties we go to. And he brings Marley with him everywhere. I swear they’re like the second set of twins in this family.” He smirked. “If Jett didn’t drag Marley out, didn’t make her meet people and be seen? She’d be just like Hales, at home with her nose in a book.”

  Nose in a book? They didn’t know their older cousin like I did. Yeah, Halen liked to read, liked her quiet time. But damn, she had fire. She used to at least. We’d take my bike and drive for hours, looking for the perfect back road. The second I’d kill the engine she’d swing her legs around, climbing in my lap. God, that girl’s body; I used to think she was made for me. Only for me.

  Landry started to laugh. “Halen? Her nose in a book? Do you guys know who you’re talking about?” She put her arm around Halen’s neck, and I willed her to say the words out loud that I couldn’t. “This girl? This girl knows how to party. Wow. There was this one time she got to come visit me in Florida. What was that? Right after your sixteenth birthday? It was her, Beau and me. We were on this beach in Destin, it was spring break and she—”

  “You know, can we just not? Please? I’ve had enough trips down memory lane for today so I think I’m done. Cash, would you mind running me back up to my house?” Halen stood, brushing the dirt from her tight white jeans and crossing her arms over her loose-fitting gray tank top.

  “Yeah, of course, Hales. Come on.” Cash got to his feet next to her, drawing her close to his side. He was so built, so muscular that his frame mostly eclipsed hers.

  Landry joined them. “Me too? I’m exhausted. I worked a twenty-four-hour shift before I got on that plane this morning.”

  “Why don’t we all go?” Cash looked over at his brother who had Avory sleeping in his lap.

  Crue’s head shot up. “Uh, didn’t you have some plans tonight Cash? A date?”

  Landry checked her watch. “A date? At midnight? Sounds more like a skanky high school hook-up if you ask me. You sure there isn’t something you want to tell us, C Money?”

  Crue was quick to come to his twin’s defense. “No, it’s some chick who, uh, works at a bar in town. Right, man?” His eyes were almost pleading.

  Cash’s gaze was hard, unyielding. “Nope, no date. And even if I did, I would go ahead and cancel it.
It’s been a long, stressful day, and I doubt tomorrow is going to be any better.” He crossed his arms over his chest, almost daring his brother to push the issue.

  Holy fucking shit.

  I groaned, letting my head hang while everything clicked into place. Please tell me they weren’t doing what I thought they were doing. I looked up, directly at Crue, but speaking to Cash. “Motley Crue and I are going to stay down here for a bit. You go ahead and take the girls home, come back for us.” I’d been gone for a long time, but I was still the oldest boy. And I needed to regulate. Hard.

  Crue looked down at the girl in his arms. “Cash, here, take Avory with you.” When Cash crossed the space between them and bent down to take Avory from his twin’s arms, Crue laughed. “Careful, man, make sure she doesn’t wake up and think you’re me.” Cash sent him a glare but didn’t respond. Instead he carried Avory to the Razor and laid her in the front seat, buckling her in and then took off.

  I popped open another beer. “That’s it, isn’t it?”

  “What’s it?” Crue grabbed himself one out of the cooler, twisting off the top and then tossing it in the fire. “What are you talking about?”

  “The girls, they think that Cash is you.” I knew I wasn’t wrong. Between Avory’s comment and Crue insisting that Cash had a date to get to. The tension between them? I wish I had it all wrong, but in my gut I knew I didn’t.

  “What?” His tone held attitude, but I could see the nervousness in his dark blue eyes.

  I pointed at him through the flames with my bottle. “You have your brother, your twin, fucking your girls.”

  “What? Uh, that’s so far off base.” He wasn’t looking at me. He was peeling the label off his beer, one tiny shred of paper at a time.

  “Crue, you’re my cousin, I know you. You’ve had a different girl in the back seat of your truck every night since you were still too young to drive it. And now you can’t stop, because people would suspect that you had a girlfriend. They would put two and two together and they’d know about you and Avory.” I let out a deep breath. “Which means the parents would find out too.”