Infamy (RiffRaff Records Book 3) Read online

  “Did you unplug him?”

  “No.” He chuckled. “But when we got to the studio, there were technicians working on the computer. Apparently Luke called and complained at some point last week.” Brody would disconnect the computer every time my Uncle Luke started talking to Talon about me.

  “That’s kind of hilarious.” I stole my spoon back.

  “I know, right?” He sighed and laid his head on my lap, turning to talk to my stomach. “Did you behave today? Did your mom feed you any food without sugar?”

  Brody talked to my stomach more and more every day. Neither one of us had brought up anything too serious since that night in my car on the way home. We were both avoiding the big stuff.

  “I had a great day actually. And I had a salad for lunch, per your not-so-passive suggestion.” He was pretty protective over the baby, the baby that might not be his. He made sure I ate healthy, at least one meal a day. He always reminded me about my meds and he bought me a giant water bottle that would start to blink red when it was time to drink more.

  He kissed my tummy through my shirt. “It’s not raining. Did you see that? Did you?” He sat up and wiggled his eyebrows. I nodded and he took the ice cream away from me, putting the lid on and then getting up to shove it into the freezer. “Does that mean we can fuck on the balcony?”

  I sighed, resting my head back on the couch cushions and turning to look at him. His eyes were excited and there was a hopeful smile on his face. His hands were resting on his trim hips, his board shorts sitting low. “I suppose.”

  He scooped me off the couch and grabbed the big fluffy white blanket that was next to me. “That’s my bad girl.” He slapped my yoga pants-covered ass and then opened the accordion glass doors that led to my terrace.

  My balcony overlooked the ocean, and it was staggered with the one next door. Enough privacy. I had some nice furniture out there and when we used a big blanket, it would look like we were snuggling. I hoped.

  Brody put me down and I wrapped the blanket around my shoulders, holding it wide so that he could drop his shorts. He sat his bare ass on the outdoor couch, and then slid my pants off, helping me step out of them. He reached down and pulled a condom from his pocket, making me giggle. “You walked in the door prepared?”

  “I’m always prepared. I literally want to fuck you all damn day.”

  Why phrases like that made me smile, I’d never understand. “I guess we don’t really need condoms now. I mean, as long as you’ve been tested.”

  “I’m clean. I swear. And I haven’t been with anyone else since I met you.” Brody’s words tumbled out, one after another. “I don’t have to wear it?”

  I shook my head and he threw it, half opened, down on the cement ground.

  “Today just keeps getting better and better.” He held his hands out wide. “Come here, baby cakes.”

  I climbed on his lap, straddling him while he held my face in his palms. He pulled me closer, his eyes locking on mine. I felt emotion start to rise in my throat; I was getting choked up for no fucking reason. I took a deep inhale, trying like hell to calm down. This was nothing new, nothing different, and I needed to get my hormones under control. Brody was kissing my neck, my chest, my breasts. His hands were on my back, slipping down to my ass. I felt him everywhere. His grip tightened on my hip, guiding me onto his hard cock. I sank down slowly, loving the way he felt bare inside me.

  “Fuck, baby, you feel…” He words trailed off, his lips finding mine instead. He fisted one hand in my hair. We moved together, the blanket wrapped around us both. Our foreheads were touching, our breath mingling. I had my arms around his neck. I’d never felt as close to him as I did at that moment.

  “Brody, don’t stop. Please don’t fucking stop.”

  He brushed the hair from my face, placing kisses up the column of my neck. “Look at me.” He pulled back, making me meet his gaze. “I’ll never stop, Landry. Never. I promise.”

  Tears filled my eyes when I saw the emotion in his. We both knew he was talking about so much more than what was happening in that moment.

  He slapped my ass, a smirk on his face. “Now ride me harder, I know you can.”

  I was feeling too much; we both were. So Brody did what Brody did best: he lightened the mood. He saved me, he made me throw my head back and laugh. I dug my nails into his shoulders, fucking him harder.

  “That’s my girl.” His head fell back, his mouth parting. He was close.

  “Brody, I need…” He sat up, knowing exactly what I was asking for. He put his hand on my lower back, pulling our bodies flush. Now my clit was rubbing on his pelvis, creating the perfect amount of friction. I rested my head on his shoulder, being louder than I should be, so damn close to flying over the edge.

  “I want to hear you scream, baby cakes.”

  I shook my head, biting my lip. “Someone will hear us.”

  “Good.” He put both hands on my ass, making me fuck him even harder. The friction on my clit was too much, too good. I gave him exactly what he was demanding. I yelled his name into the night as I came. His grip on my flesh was going to leave marks.

  “Fuck, Landry.” He stopped breathing, finishing inside me, filling me completely.

  ***

  “Hey, Brody?”

  “Hm?”

  We were lying on the couch, inside now, watching an old Tim Burton movie. I was using his naked body as a mattress and he was trailing his fingertips up and down my back. “Do you think maybe we could pretend that Travis doesn’t exist? Just for a little while?”

  “What do you mean?”

  I rested my chin on my fist, looking away from the movie and at him. “For the next few weeks, until my twelve-week appointment, can we pretend that there doesn’t need to be a paternity test? That there isn’t a question and there isn’t drama.” I gave him a half smile and a small shrug. “I know it sounds dumb.”

  “I love it.”

  “Yeah?” I raised my eyebrows, a little surprised that he was so eager to go along with my ridiculous plan.

  “Yeah, I think it’s a really good idea.” He sat the remote by his side and then brushed my hair back from my face. “The stress isn’t good for you or the baby, and I’m not going anywhere. I think it’ll be fun. We can laugh and eat and fuck and hang out. It’ll be a really great way to spend our last few weeks together before I leave on tour.”

  “You know, us doing this, it’s kind of twisted.”

  He nodded, his brows drawn slightly down. “Oh, it’s totally twisted.”

  “Thank you.” I kissed his chest then laid my head over his heart.

  Chapter Twenty

  Brody

  “Hey. Can you maybe, like, focus on the meeting?” Brax waved his hand in front of my face. I shook my head a little, trying to clear my brain of all things Landry. “I’d like to get out of here before fucking sun-up.”

  “My bad.” I shrugged. “It’s a little hard to concentrate.” Landry’s twelve-week appointment was tomorrow. And then I would be leaving on Friday to start the tour. There was a lot on my mind. More than a lot.

  Landry and I had been going strong for six weeks now. But it was time for the paternity test, and it was time for me to head out on the road. Real life was setting in real fucking fast.

  I sat back and listened while our new road manager, Ted, went over the schedule in incredible detail, which I swear took three hours.

  Brax stood and stretched his arms over his head. “That was boring as fuck.”

  “I’m still here.”

  Brax froze, a wince forming on his face. Ted wasn’t gone; he was standing by the door talking to our sound manager.

  “Yeah man, I know. I was kidding. That’s how we operate…welcome to the family.” Brax bit his lips together, trying not to laugh.

  Dane grabbed him by the back of the shirt, steering him toward the exit. “Let’s go get some dinner, jackass.”

  I pulled out my cell, texting Landry to let her know my meeting was fina
lly over and I was heading home. “See you guys on Friday.” I wouldn’t leave Landry one second before I had to.

  “How are you doing with all this, bro?” Talon was following me out, turning off lights on his way. “Other than rehearsal, we haven’t really seen much of you these past few weeks.”

  “I know. I’m sorry.”

  “Hey, no need to apologize. I get it, we all do.” He paused at his car, leaning against the bumper. “I just wanted to check in, see where your head was.”

  Talon, all the guys, had been giving me my space. They were all so supportive of me being there for Landry—always texting to ask how she was, always so sweet to her when she came to rehearsal with me. They were invested in us, and it made my heart happy. But it also added a lot of stress. Talon wasn’t shy about where he stood on the baby-daddy issue. He wanted Landry and I to raise the baby together, no matter who the biological father was. To him things were simple, and to me they weren’t. Luckily he hadn’t brought it up since the night Luke asked him to stay with Landry.

  “They do the blood work tomorrow for the paternity test, and to find out if she’s having a boy or a girl.” I copied his stance against the car, crossing my arms over my chest. “I’m excited for this tour; it’s a dream come true. But leaving Landry is going to be really hard. The next time we have a break, she’ll be six months pregnant. I’m afraid to be away from her.”

  “Afraid that she won’t take care of herself?”

  “Afraid that we’ll find out the baby is Travis’s and they’ll get back together while I’m away on tour.” I sighed. “Afraid that something will happen to her or the baby and I won’t be there for them. Afraid that she’ll realize I’m not nearly good enough for her. Afraid that after all this time, the relationship we’ve developed will disappear the moment I step foot on that bus.” I sent him a tight smile. “You name it, I’m afraid of it.”

  “Have you two talked? About what happens after the paternity test?”

  I shook my head. “A few weeks ago we decided that we’d give ourselves until her twelve-week appointment to avoid all things paternity related. We don’t talk about who the father is, or the fact that it might not be me. We just laugh and fuck and pretend that our lives are easy and uncomplicated.”

  “Is that healthy?”

  “Fuck if I know.” I stood up, heading toward my car. “But her appointment is tomorrow.” I waved, climbed in my car, and left Talon in the parking lot.

  Tonight was Landry and my last night in our little fantasy world, and I didn’t want to spend one more minute of it away from my girl.

  ***

  “Why aren’t you naked? I thought we agreed that every time I walked through that door, you’d be naked.” I wrapped my arms around Landry, burying my face in her neck. Fuck, I was going to miss her when I left.

  “I thought maybe first we could eat, and then I would get naked.”

  She was stirring something with a wooden spoon, it smelled like spaghetti sauce. “You cooked? Baby cakes, you’ve never cooked for me.” I’d cooked for her, and Talon had cooked for the both of us once or twice. But she’d never made me dinner.

  “I figured I would do something special, since it’s our last night living in denial land.” I kissed her neck and then stepped away, sneaking a piece of garlic bread off the cutting board.

  “I prefer to think of it as a land of make believe.”

  I watched while she finished dinner and told me about her day, then I told her about my boring meeting with Ted.

  “We’ve never eaten at this table. We’ve only ever fucked on it.” I took a big bite, getting sauce all over my face in the process.

  “I know, I cleaned it like three times today.” She sat her fork down and rested her forearms on the table. “I talk about my family all the time, but you never talk about yours.”

  “Well there are about a million more people in your family tree. Plus, yours are more interesting.”

  She smiled. “Humor me.”

  I took another huge bite and then a swig of water. “My parents are both successful computer geeks. They met at MIT and they’re both wearing glasses in their wedding pictures.”

  “Really? But you’re so…you. I never would have guessed that about your parents.”

  “They started a coding company, kind of like hackers for hire, but legal. They made good money, and they were amazing parents. They wanted me to be who I wanted to be, not who they were. Sure, in the beginning they tried to push their tech-savvy ways on me, but I hated it. I think the only thing they regret is not forcing me to go to college.” I took another bite. “You should cook more often—this is really good.”

  “Thanks. Now tell me more.”

  “I grew up in San Jose, a nice neighborhood.” I sent her a small smile. “I had a great childhood.”

  She cocked her head, studying me from across the table. “Why does it sound like you’re apologizing for it?”

  “I don’t know.” I chewed another mouthful, this time stalling. “I had a great childhood, easy and drama free. And you didn’t. It feels almost selfish to talk about how good I had it.”

  She laughed quietly. “Brody, I’m glad you had a great childhood. I’m glad you were happy and loved. You are who you are because of how you were raised, and I happen to like who you are.”

  “I hate that you were hurt, that you lived so long feeling unloved and alone. I hate it, I honestly do.” I wanted to find Landry’s bio mom and scream in her face. I wanted to go back in time and find Landry as a little girl and rescue her.

  “My childhood sucked, but I’ve met people who had it way worse.” She smiled, the smile she always wore when she talked about Jacks and Bryan. “And if that’s what I had to go through in order to end up with my mom and dad, I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.”

  “You’re amazing, you know that?”

  She shrugged and went back to eating the dinner she’d made for us.

  Later that night we were lying in bed, Landry was asleep on my chest and I was watching highlights from the Quicksilver Big Wave Invitational on ESPN, when my phone started vibrating on the night stand.

  Talon: How are you doing?

  Brody: I’m okay. We won’t get the test results back for a week or so, but for some reason I’m still nervous about the appointment.

  Talon: Back to real life tomorrow, that’s gotta be tough.

  Brody: Yeah.

  Talon: Let me know how it goes?

  Brody: For sure.

  Talon: I love you, man.

  Brody: Don’t be weird.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Landry

  “You’re gaining weight, a little at a time.” Dr. Woodsen was swiping through my chart, looking at my previous numbers. “All your blood work was great. Hormone levels were right where they needed to be.” He glanced up, looking at both Brody and me. “We want to draw labs to find out the gender today, correct?”

  I nodded, taking a deep breath. “And also, we need to do a paternity test.” I hated that I had to say that out loud. I hated that I had to pop our little denial bubble. We were officially headed back to reality.

  Dr. Woodsen’s eyebrows rose, just slightly. “Okay, um, do we have samples from the possible fathers?”

  “Yeah, uh, mine. You can take my blood and then, if it’s not a match, then…it’s the other…” Brody reached over, taking my hand in his, comforting us both.

  “Okay, well I’ll send someone in here to draw labs and then I’ll email you the result in about a week.” Dr. Woodsen stood, heading toward the door.

  “Can you mail them instead?” Brody stopped him from leaving. “Would that be weird?”

  He shook his head. “Not at all, I’ll put that in the chart. We’ll mail the results to Landry’s address? That okay?” His eyes darted between Brody and me, making sure we were all on the same page.

  We both nodded.

  We were silent while we waited for the nurse to come in. I wanted to ask why Bro
dy wanted the results mailed, why he wanted this dragged out any longer than necessary. But I couldn’t find the words.

  Once we were done, skin wraps on our arms, we walked out. Hand in hand. It was as if we were both on autopilot or something. We made our way wordlessly to the cafeteria, getting flavorless lunches and sitting by a floor-to-ceiling window.

  Brody cleared his throat, startling me when he finally spoke. “Maybe we should talk now, a little, about real life.”

  I nodded. “Okay. I’ll start.”

  “Really?” He wrinkled his brow. “Usually the person who suggests starts.” He reached out and grabbed my hand. “Plus, I have something I need to say.”

  “Thank you.” I blurted out the two words that had been running through my head for the last twenty-four hours.

  “Landry.”

  I held my free hand out, stopping him. “No, please. I’m pregnant and hormonal and I need to get all this out, okay?” He kept quiet, letting me continue. “Thank you for being so amazing through all this. Thank you for sticking with me, for holding me while I slept. Thank you for all the OB appointments and all the text reminders about my meds. You didn’t have to be here, you had every right to stay away. But you’ve been right next to me, through it all, and I don’t think I’ll ever find the words to tell you how much it’s all meant to me.”

  He closed his eyes, pain etched on his handsome face. “Stop.”

  “Stop what?” My stomach was in my throat. I was terrified. Was he ready to end this? Was he trying to spare my feelings?

  “Stop talking like we’re in the past tense, like we’re over.”

  I swallowed, afraid to believe that he didn’t want us to end. “When I get the results from the test, you’ll be on the road.”

  He smiled. “There is a reason I wanted them mailed. I don’t want you to open them without me.” He got up and kneeled down beside me, taking my face in his big hands. “I don’t want to break up, I don’t want us to be over. Not yet. I can’t.” His eyes were pleading with me to understand. “I know that I still can’t tell you what you need to hear. And it’s not fair of me to ask this of you.”